I wanted to share something I wasn’t prepared for during treatment.
The pain meds (for me it was fentanyl) absolutely helped manage the pain. I’m grateful for that.
But what I didn’t expect was how quickly my body adapted—and how difficult it could be when you start to reduce or come off it. I couldn’t always tell if what I was feeling was the pain returning or withdrawal.
The part that caught me off guard wasn’t just physical—it was how it affected my patience and the people closest to me.
The pain was real and the fentanyl managed it. But the body adapts faster than you expect, and somewhere along the way a second problem opened quietly alongside the first.
What I know is that my patience went. Not dramatically. But Cathy and the kids saw it.
Fatigue, pain, and whatever else was happening in my chemistry eroded the gap between feeling something and expressing it—the place where better judgement usually lives.
When the fog lifted enough for me to see it, I would apologise. Because these were the people I had made the deal for.
Not medical advice—just something I wish I’d been more aware of at the time. If you’re going through this, it might be worth talking it through early with your care team.
If others have experienced something similar, sharing it might help people feel less alone in it.